- Wednesday, October 28, 2009
11:44 PM
-
9:22 PM
等待是件很辛苦的事。。我不喜欢等待。。
因为等待会让心情变得比较差。。所以我会比较准时，我也不喜欢人家等我。。
等人的那位在等待的当时，被等的那位知道吗？
被等的那位知道等待那位的辛苦吗？
被等的那位明白等待的无奈吗？
等待的那位的无奈，的辛酸， 的期望，被等的那位会了解吗？
欺骗。。
为什么要不老实？
为什么不可以坦白？
为什么要说不坦白是想把伤害减到最低？
可是你知道吗？如果事情被揭发后，伤害反而更大。。
你说不想让我知道是不想我担心
但是，这样是代表我不够你信任吗？
你说不想让我知道是因为不想气我
可是你又可想到我知道后会更气。。
我不喜欢你欺骗我，因为这是我的原则
我不想因为你而放弃自我，我想守着我的原则
因为有我自己的原则，才有我
有时候，觉得你不想，也没有要了解我
你不知道我在生气我，我告诉你
可是说了，你有时也还是不明白。。
我真的不懂要怎样了
我很不开心，可是你却想要逃避
我很不开心，可是我却不想你伤心
我很不开心，我却想要你知道
我真的不想闹
我真的不想这样的
我真的很不想。。
* This post was grabbed from one of my friend's blog. It matches my feelings very well, especially in the past, where all the waitings are solely done by me. You said you never liked to be the one waiting. But does it mean I will be liked to wait people? No. No one likes to be wait and either anyone should thought of making people wait. And things should be done equally. Not like I should wait for all the times but you never wait me. Things will maintain better if it is equal. Sometimes you wait me while the others I wait you. Yea I know that when you "beg" for something, you should not think that you should make people wait, but didn't you will also accidentally done that sometimes.
somehow, it's not that my dad "chong huai" me, Just that you are not at the level of chong huai-ing me.
Labels: past dailies
- Tuesday, October 27, 2009
11:35 PM
A whole new page has been flipped for her as to continue with another new story books.
http://wini-freed.blogspot.com/To people who wants to continue to read her story, please try to refer to the new link as much as possible, as this current links will be more on grinnings and naggins, which it is actually not fun story anymore. All kinds of fun will be right the end place. But not here.
So long for now, see you all in the next leaf
Labels: new life
this time, it is real - Monday, October 26, 2009
1:20 PM
for the last seven months that we have past on, it seemed like it changed both of us really well. these changes makes a deep impression to both of us to the extend, we can't stand it anymore, and you just said that out from your mouth.
words after words that coming from your mouth, gives a certain kind of weight to my heart. it does not feel good, even when I smile. physiologically I want myself not to be sad in front of you anymore, as i don't wanna be your "adorable child", yet i don't wanna be so dependent upon you. i started to get myself into the car lisence, step by step, collecting money from my works start from this month, hoped to get myself the law part first, yet this words that you give me this morning burdens me more. maybe acting positively is not going to work well to me anymore. i am not a positive child right from my starting point. "i will let you go" is always the last words i keep to not letting you go away from me.
but this time, i think it will be real. it will not be another turn-over for us just like the 2 years and 5 months ago. friendship will be forever but it will not be the same for both of us anymore, not like when we were once seventeen. let's hope i can be able to go over the period and let go the marks that have made on my physically. and hope emotionally can be healed in a short while.
it is a good experience to be together with you in the past few years. it just that we aren't really going to go through our anniversary and borthdays together again.
Labels: new life
Yay~ I could have a peaceful trip for the weekends! yay~ - Thursday, October 15, 2009
7:23 PM
Finally something that I worried since last week has finally have a solution - my packed schedule for tomorrow finally have a solution by class cancellation. Thanks to Deepavali the lecturer has celebrate his holiday and I can need not go for the class, and then I will be able to go movie tomorrow peacefully and back home pack late and depart at a peaceful ways. Let's see how I torture myself without a good sleep? lol.
This morning the RapidKL is freaking me out. I was as usual in a half sleeping condition on the bus U24 on going to the college front door. And when I noticed (Or maybe when the other passenger noticed) that he is actually not turning into TAR college area (well you see, it should turn left to get into TBR area, instead of that he waiting at the traffic light preparing to turn right to wangsa maju area). One of the passenger get to him and asked him why not getting into the suppose route. And he gave us a super lame excuses - "You all suppose to tell me 'TAR College' when you all get into the bus. now I also don't wanna go back there". Lame lame excuses. I can see that you can go straight through the traffic light and get yourself into the TBR area easily. Just say "i'm lazy to take a bunch of kids into the college area", I will understand you more. I can tell you I will surely won't wait RapidKL just to get back home from now on. I will just hop into the Metro and get me out to there in the same price. you will just lose a bunch of customer by doing that. You deserve that.
Labels: dailies
How to get myself Crazy - with a Big Project and Big Vision. lol - Wednesday, October 14, 2009
9:52 PM
Kobato by CLAMP (manga and new anime)
It's just Week 2 since the semester start and I was like Hell ya facing all those in coming assignments. If I wanna make my life easier in the end, Maybe I should torture myself seriously at these two weeks - with the Health Psycho Part I /II coz it needs to be passed up by Week 4 wednesday. Yeng then. lol
Even though I am complaining this and that, I was actually still able to do a lot of FB works - to check on my application daily. So conclusion - am I that busy? lol.
Seeing my timetable, it makes me wanna pon twice continuously for English for Management (SSH). Kill me coz with the packed schedule I'm gonna face (7pm class ends, 2 hours ++ to get home, and somehow i should get out of home by 9pm again. free time for me to eat + bath? NO!!!). So tomorrow gonna ask that pity tutor whether allowed me to: A, replace the class tomorrow with other course OR B, 1 hour early return at the Friday. If Option B can't go on, then I will only have Option C - pon the class. Terrible leh. T.T
Even if excluded the FB and the time I do the not so frequent blogging, I still have time from being a anime otaku by having marathon of various anime each week. about 5 or 7 new anime that going to chase upon + 2 currently watching anime. Can I or Can't I. Hmmmm... (Am I still so "busy"? Haha)
Ok, maybe it's time for me to do my article research first b4 I continue do anything today. bye for now and continue whining next time.
Labels: dailies
Grandfather's Birthday - Thursday, October 8, 2009
11:08 PM
Well it is just another birthday but I guess it is important to encourage the old ones that they go through another years. Good job.
There is just a cutest cousin sister I will ever have (for your information, I was always the youngest cousin sister, until this cutie little girl comes up. Complex family background. That's all I am going to say).
She was aggro-ed by my other older cousin sisters and some how I was able to "tamed" her (Of course la, counselling ppl can't get the girl's mind after clues are just as well as failing your courses). I was somehow is the "same channel" with her and was able to "communicate with her" in the whole house (imagined you are a little girl and all around you are not the same channels - adults). Well, there are around 20 peoples in the house and the only one that communicate with her correctly is me.
So how? Stick with this little kids until I was not able to do my "normal socialize" life. Well sacrifice myself to the girl who is lonely without other ppl fooling around with her? No I actually quite enjoy though, Just that she was quite "too sticky" to the extend I made her cry when I was leaving. Well make promises to play with her next time when we meet again is what I can do. But I wonder how long it can last in her mind? 1 month is extremely too long for the girl who is just 3 years old.
Tomorrow gonna work and the stupid AEMS course is just banging on the time. How? pon for this time and reject all the coming jobs in Friday lo. No other ways to do things alr. Summore, I hate to get an USA from EMSD - UnSatisfied Attendence. Hate Hate HATE to get those failures. Sorry la job, I have to let you go.
Pictures will only be upload when I am free to do so, or when tomorrow if I have mood? Then I will show my cutie little cousin, my only younger cousins that is 10 years+ away from the others.
Labels: dailies
Hmmm... FB FB - Wednesday, October 7, 2009
10:14 PM
Today I was too free in FaceBook till I google any words that fly into my mind. And all of sudden remember this word - Sadomasochism, which we normally known as SM. so Don't ask me anything details alr, go googled yourself. lol
Labels: dailies
pics pics -
10:26 AM
My cute 小米和花面猫. Haha.
4-piece of starbucks coffee (Only one of them is coffee)
Caramel machiato.
today will be going back home by 2. Back home and rush for anime~ lol
Labels: pictures
Bored... Solutions? - Tuesday, October 6, 2009
9:13 PM
It's way too boring staying at home noticed that you will be college again for tomorrow. no dating for this week end got tons of things packed together. Have a great bang with dear's timetable although my Friday is free temporary (Reminder: I have work by friday sometimes, time after time at least). So the time is like zzzz when it past the week one. When week two starts, it's gonna kill both of us for not able to dating alr. Too used to last five months time alr, when he doesn't have any schooling activities.
These days and times I watched a whole lot of anime. I feel like I'm turning into a anime-otaku (anime-nerd in English). Since I had finished chasing a lot of series and even watched a whole bunches of CDs bought by bro and dear, and think it is like crazy for continuing doing that right now too. Even now I steal mum's afternoon TV time for anime (since all she does for the whole September is that too). Grrr I wonder when can I get rid of that.
Work has the lowest level of disturbance for me, at least that's how I feel, despite lesser time spend with family and friends (not like I did a lot of accompany last time). To say that work actually influence my study, actually I don't think so. Even if it's not work, I can easily influence by a lot more of other issues. So the question for me will only be - wanna work? or not? that's in me though... So do I need money do desperately? Erm...... Yea I do, somehow. Unless someone told me some ways that can earn money in a much better way. NON SALES particularly. Better don't involve sales, in the lowest level that is. HAHA. So picky huh, that's why I will stay in my position until I get a better ways outta there.
And THE RESULTS of EXAMS, now it's time to pray harder as days later, it will out to the air and can't be hid away from anyone, even myself T.T please please lecturers VWXYZ, please forgive my careless and at least gimme a C+ for each of them, so that my CGPA not so in a bad looking. XXXX
Labels: dailies
school reopens... swt times - Monday, October 5, 2009
8:49 PM
Caused by yesterday's crazy lifestyle(refer to shinying's or chingli's blog), I had a hard time getting up today for morning class. It seemed like dear also have a same prob too.
When reached college, first thing I had done is walk to Canteen 2 to bought a candy. well at the end I didn't ate much of it, coz there is no lecturer in the hall. Swt like hell. Well ended up walked to school office to get the details of other lecturer's attendance to the lecture. Ended up nothing much could be done by the office lady. planned to pon tuesday's class as it would probably no lecturer so better don't go alr. Wasted my time, youth, and travel fees for nothing only at the end.
Today is also dear's Raffles first day. Give him a lot of courage but ended up I was frighten when I heard back from him on the way back home. E.g. only 5 persons in the class included him, he is the only Malaysian, each class is 4 hours and only have one class for each for every week, can't absent for more than 3 times or else FBA(something Fail bla-bla Attendence)problems on communication etc. Mayb I should give him a comment on try to understand ppl's culture b4 talking something that may trigger people's anger.
Wished tomorrow can accom him to get his stationary that is for the interior design needed. Really... Pray hard hard for both of us... That we can get through our study life peacefully... T.T now I guess I am full with negative thoughts on my results alr...
Labels: dailies
Just when college is restarting soon, I want more holiday - Thursday, October 1, 2009
11:57 PM
Haiz, that conflict really happens right in my heart. Just when the holiday starts, I want to school. Now when school is restarting in 3 days later, I want more holiday. zzzz better don't create holiday then right in the first place, or... don't create working days?
Labels: dailies
October 2007