Today Will are spending his 12am outside, with his fren again... I really dunno why, I'm in blue now. I thought that if he's going to spend his night with me by my 21st birthday I will be just as happy as I am, but I noticed I won't... 2 years are too long for me.... I want to be with him as much as what he spend with his frens.
This month, I dunno why, I noticed he spend time with me lesser than his frens. He went out too much with his frens makes me jealous with it... And furthermore... Sounds like all of my frens are going out night as late as 3am.... I'm jealous, totally positive, I AM REALLY JEALOUS-ing. Even if my emo makes Will hates me, I will still continuing jealous. I hate myself, I hate now. What's more, I noticed i didn't take pictures for months. Last year I still got the mood to take as much pictures as i want. But these days, I dun even know what can I take pictures anymore...
My emotions are going ups and downs as roller coaster does, and it has alr been 3 weeks since I cried for the first time. I dun want to be like this. I want to be happier. I dun wanna hide myself anymore. I AM JEALOUSING AND IF ANYONE WHO WANTS TO HATE ME FOR SHOWING THIS POST, PLEAST JUST HATE ME!
風はやがて 東へ向かうだろう 解き明かすこの星の ドアを襲う 誘い水を 飲んだ 胸がつらい 遠巻きな物語り かじり合う 骨の奥まで Kaze hayagate higashi he muka udarou Toki akiraka sukono hoshi no doa wo osou Sasoimizu wo non da mune gatsurai Toomaki na monogatari kajiri au hone no oku made
生き残りたい 埋まらない傷 光 恐れてた 許された命が 今 惹かれ合った 彷徨い果てて 君のとなりで 火照り 鎮めたい 本気のカラダ 見せ付けるまで 私 眠らない Ikinokori tai uma ranai kizu Hikari osore teta Yurusa reta inochi ga ima hika re atta Houkou i hate te kun notonaride Hi teri tsutsushime tai Honki no karada mise tsukeru made Watashi nemura nai
生き残りたい 崖っぷちで良い キミを愛してる 目覚めたい気持ちが 今 惹かれ合った 狂喜に変えて 祈り捧ぐよ キミを愛してる 星座の導きで... Ikinokori tai gake ppuchide yoi Kimi wo itoshi teru Mezame tai kimochi ga ima hika re atta Kyouki ni kae te inori sasagu yo Kimi wo itoshi teru Seiza no michibiki de ...
生き残りたい まだ生きてたい キミを愛してる 本気のココロ 見せ付けるまで 私 眠らない Ikinokori tai mada iki tetai Kimi wo itoshi teru Honki no kokoro mise tsukeru made Watashi nemura nai
Both are some samples of my favourite anime these days - Macross Frontier. If you are song lover, recomment to watch this! You won't regret. Their songs and graphics are nice.
Nowadays I was busy with part-time job. And quite annoyed... Mayb I should tell her straight "I dun like Saturday jobs. I wanna go out with frens."
Last month I worked for 9 days. Paid 500 just for that month (although haven't get yet). Worth ma? I lost all my life instinct just for 500 wages. Maybe... Not so worth afterall. Coz for that 500, I used 70 on buying clothes, 100± for food, 30± for travel, the rest I think should be used up at the F.I.R. concert ticket. There goes all the money, at least for what that should be in my ATM, 250. When the salary out, I need to pay back what I owned my mum. Sienz.
And I noticed what my frens said was right. Work for full shift was not that stressed up afterall. Paid 72 and no need to look at her face (although her face is not that hard to looked on). Working with her makes the person more stressed and wished to run away more. At least I have this same feeling with my fren. I wished the whole September does not need to work. Let me rest for the whole September. Wake me up when September ends suits me when the time comes :P
P.S. this her is the same person - the permanent worker at my work place.
I think if I say
the "bore" word more
I will really become
a boring person...
There is no truth nor lies,
There is only trust and doubts.
Loves : Hates
♥ Love ♥
♥ Will
♥ To be Loved
♥ Window Shopping (but better if it is "purchasing")
♥ To hear, not so much on singing
♥ Travelling (but seldom able to)
♥ Dating~
♥ Animal, any of them
♥ Handcraft
♥ Cosmetics & skincare
♥ Salary (coz only then I can buy, buy, buy!)
X Hate X
X Alone, Dark, and Ghost Story
(include scary, horror stuff)
X Blood
X Someone else (too rude to list out :P)
X Back-stabbers
X Bugs (especially those fly one)
X Earning money (It's really hard, trust me!)
♥ X Love and Hate♥ X
♥ X Buses (Especially U11 & U24)
♥ X Study & Exams
♥ X Money and Time
♥ X Life and Death
SALARY OUT! YAY~ (but can't spend too much as I'm going to buy DEAR"S PRESENT!!! lol)
For people out there who wanna date me at weekends:
Please do so beforehead as I have my weekend schedule full with
part time jobs usually so if really wanna book me,
please tell me at least 1 week earlier~ TQ TQ :p
ok you all win. get yourself adding me @ Facebook.
October 2007